I was interviewed by their wedding columnist in DC, the lovely Leslie Weekes of Leslie Manning Events
I have found (through my own observations) that the most difficult search, after the wedding venue, for engaged couples is the officiant. If you don’t have the family minister or priest who baptized you, confirmed you, etc. etc. etc. then finding someone with whom you can share your story and trust them to bless your marriage is hard work. Some couples give up and head straight to the marriage license office for a civil ceremony, but have you seen the DC marriage license office? Fortunately, there’s another alternative: Meet Michelle Hilburn. Michelle came to me as a bride early in 2008. She was interviewing me as a potential wedding planner and I ended up interviewing her as a potential wedding officiant for one of my couples. In the end, it all worked out and Michelle is now on my shortlist of DC wedding officiants. Michelle is a practicing Conservative Jew.
Do you marry people of different faiths and cultures?
I love it when couples come to me with an idea of a ritual, and then we work together to make it unique for them. For example, one couple I’m working with now enjoys food and cooking together. They wanted to incorporate the idea of the gifts of wine, bread, and salt into the wedding (in short, to wish that the couple will never thirst for friendship, will never have hunger for want or desire, and that while life may present challenges, these challenges will make us better). So for them, we took it one step further and incorporated specific wines, breads and spices prepared by friends, which allowed them to share this moment in a different way with those they are close to.
While I have had many couples disagree with me on this one, I believe that weddings are not just about the bride and groom, but about the community recognizing the couple as one family unit. This slight difference in perspective means that it is very important to me that the families (biological or spiritual) are supportive and engaged in the process, as well as the happy couple. Sometimes this means making an extra effort to be inclusive of traditions from both families, other times this means being more careful in word choices so as not to offend either party. And of course, the couple has to be happy, too. But to spend this extra effort now buys years of good will later, and ultimately, the wedding is just the beginning of a marriage, not an isolated event.